Mood:
happyNow Playing: Prince with Sheena Easton, You've Got the Look
Topic: you, only better
Darlings, every day I receive calls from friends asking for advice on a wide-range of topics. Miss O is an expert in more than a few areas, but my favorite questions are fashion and etiquette related. With close friends, pleasantries are dispensed with and the inquiry is broached without hesitation. None of that: How are you? Fine, and yourself? Lovely. How about those Sox. Say, could I ask you...
This is how Miss O's advice-line works:
Friend of O: Yo
Miss O: Yo, what up?
FoO: I'm going to a cocktail party and have no idea what to wear.
Miss O: What look are you going for?
FoO: Hot, smart, weird.
Miss O: Sleeveless black dress, fitted but not too short. Bring a wrap in case there are leering old men. High heels. Funky jewelry.
Case Closed. Next Caller.
Friend of O: Where can I get a good bra in a larger size?
Miss O: Are you looking for an "occasion bra" or something for everyday?
FoO: Everyday, but not old lady-looking.
Miss O: Go to xxxx (Miss O does not provide 'unpaid' endorsements), ask for Suzie, tell her Miss O sent you.
And, next!
Friend of O: Hey.
Miss O: Hey.
FoO: Where's a good place for brunch in [insert any neighborhood]?
Miss O: Try Resto X and be sure to order the eggs benedict. OR try Resto Y if you really want to impress your date.
FoO: I knew you would know.
The phone keeps ringing..
Friend of O: I have to go to a schmoozy event. It's a Latin theme, festive-attire suggested. What the fuck do I wear? And, is a necktie obligatory?
Miss O: Do you have a pocket square? a red one?
FoO: Yeah.
Miss O: Good black shirt?
FoO:Uh-huh.
Miss O: Dark suit, black shirt unbuttoned at the neck, no undershirt, red pocket square.
FoO: That is so money!
(N.B. While this look is totally money, it should not be attempted by everyone, especially if you are already feisty and latino...call me if you're unsure)
Your estimated waiting time is...hello?
Friend of O: Where can I get my watch battery changed?
Miss O: Go to the Russian clock store. Talk to Sergei.
Elevator music...
Friend of O: I'm going to a Martini party. Do I have to bring gin/vodka or can I bring wine?
Miss O: Martini party?! What time are you picking me up?
